Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Balls the size of Alpha Centauri

I've been getting e-mails from John Kerry. Before the election, I understood, especially since I'd given the man's campaign money. Since then, the e-mails have continued. Well, fine. More spam, really, at this point. I should tell them to knock it off, but I haven't gotten around to it.

About an hour ago, the phone rang. It was some fundraiser hired by "Friends of John Kerry". He gave me a pitch about how John Kerry was pushing to insure all of the uninsured people in the country. As far as I can recall, he didn't actually say, but I assume we're talking about health insurance, unless John Kerry has an interest in people driving without collision coverage. So health insurance. Yeah, that's gonna be an easy thing to fix.

So, to help John insure all of these people, could I give him $110? By now, I was irritated by this thinly veiled attempted money grab--I mean, what does health insurance have to do with John Kerry's campaign war chest (and it was obvious that the call would wind up with a money grab)?

With that in mind, I was ready with my response as soon as he made his pitch: "Feel free to tell John he can give me a call in three years if he's running for something."

The nerve. Oh, and I love the thing about "John" appreciating my help and "John" wanting them to call me. Blah, blah, blah. John Kerry wouldn't know me if his limo ran me down in the street. Give me a break!


Andy said...

I have decided to permanently boycott Iowa because of John Kerry.

Harlis Dinwiddie said...

Uhm, didn't Billary try this same thing a couple of years ago?

SAMerican Revolution said...

Hmmm...I was just talking to John the other day and he mentioned you. He said he loved your blog and bet you had tons of money stashed away and was going to have one of his minions call you. Guess it didn't work...

Pope Benedict XVI said...

You tell him.

orbicon perpendaplex said...

When John originally asked me to do his evil bidding I simply said "Maaaaaster. Yes Maaaaaster.".
I did want to convey that you had limited funds outside of an election campaign, but my spoken english is very limited.
Sorry I called during your nap.

-Minion #73

Matt_Sweet said...

I get the messages from Kerry as well, and I don't think it bodes well for Kerry that he's circulating e-mail petitions. I keep waiting to see "John Kerry wants you to know about Herb)al V'iagra."

Jack said...

John Kerry grows balls

On Friday February 10th I received an e-mail from John Kerry asking me for a donation to fight the Bush Administration. Imagine the size of balls it takes to ask for a donation to fight the Bush Administration from the same pussy who promised he would not give up the stolen election in 2004 and then did exactly that. Where was his fighting spirit back when it could have made a difference?

from my blog: