Sunday, April 03, 2005

Ooh, what is that scent you're wearing?

Last night, after what was a very long, tiring day, we put the dogs out in the back yard for one last time before calling it a night. Little did I realize, Mandy was going to make a stop at the fragrances counter.

"Fragrances counter?" you may ask. No, not the one at Macy's. This one is right in our back yard.

You see, this yard has had a couple of feral cats living in it for years (although I suspect we may see less of them now that three dogs have moved into this house). Anyhow, cats will do what cats will do. So Mandy found herself at the doggie equivalent of the Macy's Fragrances Department, standing at the counter, reveling in the latest intoxicating fragrance.

"Excuse me, ma'am," said the sales clerk, "have you smelled our newest scent?" Catching a wiff, Mandy gasps, "oh my, is that the new CK Cat Poop?" "Yes, it is," coos the clerk, "and it's just the thing for you. You'll smell wonderful!"

"I'll take it!" exclaims Mandy.

At this counter, one doesn't check out. No, one looks at the pile of cat poop lying in the grass and rolls over in it, mashing it nicely into one's fur.

Mandy successfully accomplished this acquisition of a new fragrance, thinking "all the other dogs will be so jealous of me. This is the best stuff! I smell hot!!!"

Now, here's the really sad part. Mandy's daddies have no appreciation for the finer things in life. They took one look at the poop, turned up their noses and then Daddy Marc started yelling at her. He even gave her a whack on the behind before dragging her into the shower where he ruined the new scent with stinky shampoo and lots of water.


So that was how our evening ended. No relaxing in the soaking tub. No wild sex in the new bedroom. Nope, Mandy got a shower, I got to do more laundry while that was going on, and then we went to bed and fell asleep. Such an exciting life! ;)


Mary said...

LOL...Thanks for the laugh, needed it :) Enjoy the new house!

Tuna Girl said...

Awww. Kids are always ruining the best moment with poop.

And hey! Your blog is getting as poopy and pukey as mine! Rock on Daddy Jess.

SAMerican Revolution said...

So glad to hear the whole family is having a good time in the new house!

PS Happy Birthday

PSS Towleroad's link goes to The Traveling Spotlight :)

obliquity said...

'Well you came and you gave without taking/ But I sent you away, oh Mandy/ Well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking/ And I need you today, oh Mandy'

(Okay, so I couldn't resist. On the other hand, maybe Mandy's masterplan was to take a shower with Marc. Hmmm.)

Matt_Sweet said...

Funny. Reminded me of this cartoon.

Knottyboy said...

We live in a cattle field and the cows do there biznez in it. We one day Coffee came back to the house with a pile of green cow flop on her head. ON HER HEAD! Nowhere else on her head for frig'sake. I washed her and let her go, she ran back out into the field for anouther helping. Kids, can't shoot them, can't skin them and wear them as fuzzy slippers.

Greg said...

Mandy was just showing you how much she loves the new fragrance counter you found for her! It could have been worse; when I was younger, our dog decided to say hello to a skunk.

Scott said...

My dog used to love rolling in dead animal carcasses... it could have been worse.

PatCH said...

LOL. Our dog would love to roll in dead frogs. She'd come strutting back thinking she was smelling all pretty and everything, and we'd have to hose her off.

Not pretty.


Andy said...

My dear, sweet departed dog Ginger used to sneak into the garage when we weren't looking and eat poop out of the catbox. Then she'd come into the living room and puke it up. That was just LOVELY.

millty said...

AH HA HA HA! Dog owners everywhere will agree. Dogs + Poop = Manditory Clean Up