I probably should seek professional help

Today, I attended an all-day conference in Manhattan. To get there, I took the lovely Long Island Railroad into Manhattan. I don't read on the train, as that tends to make me feel icky (a medical term) and turn my complexion rather green.

I will, however, take short glances at what everyone around me is reading. This morning, a man was sitting across from me, reading Newsday. This is the second best use for Newsday, but I guess that's all he could do with it at the time since there wasn't a birdcage or puppy in need of housebreaking anywhere on the train.

Anyhow, glancing over, I saw that the headline was "I'm All Right," with a subtitle explaining that a New York City firefighter who was serving his country over in Iraq had called his buddies from the hospital after being wounded to let them know he was doing well.

So what thought came to mind? Was it "how great that he is serving his country, in addition to being a firefighter!"? Well, I thought that the other day when I first heard about this guy, but that wasn't what struck me this morning. So was it "how nice that he called his buddies!"? No, not that.

Actually, when I read "I'm All Right", what came to mind was a Kenny Loggins tune running through my head with a non-stop movie loop of a dancing gopher. That's a Caddyshack reference, if any of the more refined among you missed it.

So where does that leave me? A story about a wounded soldier, etc., and my mind immediately skips over to a mischievous dancing gopher. The soldier may be alright (my preferred spelling of the term, by the way), but I'm not sure that I am! :)

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One last note: I love going into Manhattan. So many hot men are roaming free throughout Manhattan. When I'm elected Emperor, it's going to be very hard, so to speak, to choose which ones to molest. I mean, I have an excellent sex drive, but there's still just one of me. So I can command only so many to do my bidding!

I guess the cream of today's crop was this one maintenance guy who was working at the conference, putting things away as the day wrapped up. He looked like a slightly younger version of Daniel Sunjata. Just to be clear, Daniel Sunjata doesn't need to be a day younger for me to want to ravage him, but this young man upon whom my eyes feasted today was a jaw dropper. Aside from being quite handsome, he had long legs, upon which he had apparently had his pants sprayed, and his shirt could barely contain his lovely chest.

Everyone sing, So many men, so little time... (Of course, I'm not allowed to even try with any of the other men these days, but it's still fun to look and imagine!)