Friday, January 04, 2008

Old friends lost

Today, I was reminded that it's been much too long since I last saw my law school friend Mike. So I looked him up on New York's attorney search site. He's working for the state now (he was with a big law firm at last check), and I sent him an e-mail to say hi. I hope to hear back soon.

So then I thought, "As long as I'm looking, I wonder how Mario is doing." Another old law school friend. So I went back to the search page and entered this friend's name. Sure enough, it listed him as a member of the Bar, but then I saw the status and my blood ran cold: "Deceased."

I felt tears well. I did more online searching and found that he died just last year. I feel like I just missed him. I feel like I've suffered a loss.

I also feel guilty. I should have done a better job of staying in touch. Yes, that's a two-way street, but I still feel... well, I guess none of the emotions related to losing a friend are particularly good, even if it's a friend with whom I'd lost touch.

I need to be better about these things. Life is too short!

Rest in peace, Mario.


d. chedwick bryant said...

don't feel bad-- it really is a two way street... sometimes you look up old pals and they wonder why out loud. i recently found and old friend --she walked into the coffee shop where i was, and said hello--it had been 20 years--we were near neighbors for 13 years without knowing it-- we renewed the friendship. but that is rare i think.

but you can't renew them all.

d. chedwick bryant said...

i have to add --i had a similar exp. i ran into an old boss on the street and promised to stay in touch--time passed and so did he before i could get together with him-- i still feel weird about that one.

ATG said...

what a crazy way to find out someone has passed away.
i would mourn for them as well...and feel some guilt as well...

Dantallion said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Such is the nature of life...good people come in and out of our lives, and there never seems enough time to maintain ties with all of them. Sad, really. **Hug**